What is one to do
when a love that is so true
hurts so deeply and tears us apart.
You have your life
I too have mine
Neither one what we truly want
but choices, we have none.
My heart is yours forever
that I will not deny
But I will give up happiness
before we tear each other apart.
So many times we have tried
so many times we have failed
as much as I love you
I still have never made you truly mine.
I was under the influence when I said Goodbye
that too is the truth
I would not have had the strength to do it otherwise
I just had a little help to do what I knew I had to do.
I want to remember the feelings of love
I want to remember the times we shared together
I want to remember the passion in our eyes
I want to remember the feeling of your arms around me
I want to remember the times when the world around us did not exist.
For me there will be no other
I can give my heart but once
You will carry it with you for eternity
please, to it be kind.
Once in a while, when the pain is gone
remember what we once shared
and remember that wherever I am, I still care.
I choose to remember only the good times
your love will be in my heart for the rest of my life.
Your eyes with sparkles of green and honey
will forever in my mind be engraved
I will with love remember
when they were directly over mine.
Love is eternal
even if togetherness is not.
my heart is yours forever
please, to it be kind.
I wish you luck
I wish you love
I wish you all which you could not find at my side.
There are tears in my eyes
my heart is filled, it can take no more
will the pain ever stop"
probably not, but I will wait.
Strong I was before I met you
Strong once more I shall become
I will never again love
but your love will forever be in my heart
no one can ever take that away from me.
Once the pain is over
I will never again hurt
I know I will never again feel loved
but it is the price I have to pay.
I will love and need you always
yet I will still let you go
Forever in the nights I will whisper your name
Forever in days I will see your face.
Yes, I erased your names
but not because I did not love you
but because I loved you too much
and could not stand the pain.
God, when does the pain stop
will my heart ever let go of the pain?
will I forever suffer
how can I not?
Never again will I get to hold you in my arms.
I am being silly
this is helping none
foolishly I thought
that writing would heal my heart.
It matters not, for you know I love you
It matters not what my words are
my heart will forever
remain true to its first and only real love.
Will you ever see this?
of that I have no clue
I tremble and fear that your arms you would extend
I know you should not see it
until I am strong enough to walk away.
I would give my life to feel your arms around me again
there is nothing I would not do to feel your lips on mine.
To think I have forfeited happiness
a thought I was sure would have never crossed my mind.
How strong am I really?
This would be the real test.
Can I know you are there and not pray for kiss?
God, I cannot even be your friend.
From my life you will disappear
as shall I from yours as well.
I could not stand to know you are near
I am not that strong my dear.
My book I will continue
in helplessness despair I will cling to it
as I once clinged to you
an ending I never expected, no part two.
I sit here and wonder
will you love again?
will you love her as much as you once loved me?
will she love you as much as I will forever love you?
I only hope if you ever do, that she gives you all you never found in me.
If I could only rewrite the end
it would be one where you would,
if you ever my name mentioned,
tell others that you once loved me above all.
What right do I have to ask that of you?
I should just shut up and go away.
How dare I impose conditions on a goodbye?
it might be because I still care.
How can anyone say goodbye
to the one most loved in life?
Am I doing the right thing?
or just destroying us both?
God, please help me to do what is best.
If I made decisions with my heart, in his arms I would be now.
If I made decisions with my head, I would be smart enough to stop the pain.
Then why am I hurting so deeply?
Will the pain ever cease some?
Does love make sense?
is it even supposed to?
There is no tranquility in my heart
there is no peace in my soul.
I don't want you to see me cry
I don't want you to know I hurt
I rather you think I am mean, callous, cynical and selfish
that would make it easier for you to move on.
